A man in the US is hoping to lure in matches on Tinder by flaunting his abundance of toilet roll.
Stockpiling amid the coronavirus has led to shortages of bog roll across the world, but Jameson MacInnis is clearly well-endowed in the a**e wipes department, as he has revealed in a series of saucy snaps.
You might think that nobody would be on Tinder during lockdown, given that dating in the real world beyond our homes is now forbidden. However, quarantine appears to have had the opposite effect on usage, with the app reporting a 25 percent increase in messages in hard-hit countries like Italy and Spain.
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However, 40-year-old Jameson said the photos were really just designed to make people laugh, rather than bag loads of matches.
He said: "Honestly I just want to make people laugh. I hope someone just looks at them.
"Ironically I haven't matched with anyone on Tinder so people clearly don't know a good thing when they see it."
Clearly, Jameson and I have very different definitions of 'ironic'.
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The IT worker, from Bristol, Connecticut, said he first had the idea after scrolling on the app out of boredom - which is presumably a major reason why activity has surged on a global level.
He said: "I am working from home and I live alone and I was bored out of my mind, as many people are.
"I was looking through Tinder and my pictures were old and, out of the corner of my eye, I saw my toilet paper stash."
But before you get all uppity about his abundance of bum paper, Jameson was keen to point out that his stash predates the pandemic and he hasn't done any stockpiling.
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He said: "I always have loads of toilet paper because I do subscribe and save on Amazon," he said.
"I probably have about 50 rolls of toilet paper. I'm super prepared.
"I also have a bidet - if the toilet paper doesn't bring the girls to the yard, maybe my bidet will."
So ladies, if this bounty of bum cleaning options is too tempting to resist, swipe right for Jameson and you could land yourself a virtual date.
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Jameson said: "I wouldn't meet up with them but I am still swiping. I'm courting from the internet.
"I absolutely would consider going on a video date - I would even dress up from the waist up."
Let's all bring some positivity, support and fun to anyone who might find themselves in isolation as a result of the coronavirus spread. Need some entertainment? Join Isolation Nation: https://www.facebook.com/groups/coronasupport/
Topics: Daily Ladness, Funny, Tinder, Community