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A hospice nurse has shared the common signs to look out for when someone is on their dead bed.
Ah, yes, cheery thoughts. But Julie shares information like this on her YouTube in the hope it will help us all deal a little better with losing our loved ones.
In a previous clip, she shared the three words most people say before they die.
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And while not all of these necessarily happen to everyone, she describes ‘six phenomena’ that often happen at the end of a person’s life when their health deteriorates - or ‘at least six that we see commonly’.
Terminal Lucidity
Julie says this is also known as the ‘rally’ or ‘the surge’ as it happens when someone who looks very ill ‘suddenly gets a burst of energy’ as if they are getting better.
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She explains about one in three of their patients experiences this and wants people to be aware in case they are with a loved one and it happens.
“Terminal lucidity looks like someone’s going to die very soon then suddenly they have a burst of energy, they maybe have a really great day, they’re suddenly hungry, they’re suddenly able to walk, they’re suddenly very alert and oriented. And then shortly after, usually a day or two, they will die.”
She added that it can be ‘the hard part’ if you’re not prepared.
Visioning
Says this is the ‘most talked about’ sign and that it’s ‘wild’. Apparently, this is different to hallucinating and seeing bright lights and it happens to ‘many people’.
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The nurse explains it happens ‘a few weeks before death’ and the person may seem to be acting normally but then will ‘vision’ someone like a dead loved one and chat to them.
If this does happen, she says it’s best to just comfort them and go along with it.
Choosing when to die
A rather ‘crazy’ one, Julie says she has seen ‘some extreme cases’ of people saying ‘tonight’s when I’m going to die’ and well, they do.
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She explained how many people wait until everyone has left the room or after a big milestone and then ‘finally let go’.
The ‘death reach’
“Now a lot of times some of these all go in together, so sometimes visioning goes along with the death reach,” the nurse explains.
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As you might be able to imagine, this is when a person is lying in bed and they reach ‘up in the air’ as if they are reaching for someone ‘either to hug them or to shake their hands’.
Julie says they try and normalise this for people’s family as it’s best to not to do anything while they’re reaching.
The ‘death stare’
Again, this apparently often goes along with the reach. And just as it sounds, it’s when a person starts staring at a spot ‘intently’ and won’t break out of it ‘until they’re ready’.
“A lot of times there’s a smile on their face, a lot of times that will come with the reach as they’ll stare first and then they’ll reach,” she adds.
While the nurse doesn’t know why this happens, she says she does see it a lot.
The shared death experience
Julie explained that this has happened to her before and is the ‘most impactful thing’ she’s experienced.
Apparently this is 'when someone who is not dying feels or sees or understands what’s happening to the person who is dying.'
“It’s kind of like the dying person giving you the sensation of what they’re going through," she said.
So, this might be another bit of a spiritual one, but people can find it quite reassuring and many really do believe in it. But Julie hopes it will help people deal better with death.
Jess Battison