It can be hard to keep up with the terminology around dating trends, and you'll be pleased to know there's a new one to stick in your dating dictionary.
The past few weeks have brought us such gems as 'bird theory' and 'throning', but as long as people find ways to make relationships more complicated, they'll keep coming up with pithy terms.
For those interested, 'bird theory' is a viral new relationship test which is meant to gauge how interested your partner is by you pointing out a bird even if there isn't one and seeing if your partner looks around.
If they're not interested, then apparently they've failed the test, though a number of dating experts have warned not to put too much stock in interactions like these.
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Meanwhile, 'throning' is dating someone who boosts your reputation by being associated with them, basically someone who can drag you to feeling like you're a higher status and parade around on social media.
But today, we're here to talk about 'stacking'.
What is the 'stacking' dating trend?
As for 'stacking', or 'stack dating' to some, Men's Health says it's a dating trend where men will schedule lots of dates in one day and have them in rapid succession, or put a date in a day with errands and fit the time around it.
Basically, you might go for coffee with one date on your work lunch break and then go for drinks with someone else before heading off, as you've got something else on that evening.
Instead of giving a whole day or evening to a date and seeing where it goes from there you just find some time in your busy schedule and whatever happens, happens.
It's been going viral due to people showing their supposed success with 'stacking' on social media, though of course it does depend on you being able to get enough dates to fill your calendar.
Show offs.
Why do people do it?
First and foremost it's easier and quicker, taking less time out of your life for dating and just fitting it in where you can.
Fans of the idea reckon it lets you go into a date with less pressure and not put it all on one person to be the date that works.
Neuropsychologist Sanam Hafeez told Men's Health: "You’re less likely to ignore red flags or rush into something just because it feels exciting. It gives you space to see who actually fits into your life instead of trying to make someone fit."
If you've only got one date lined up, apparently that makes it do or die as far as your relationship prospects are concerned, at least in the short term, which might cause you to rush past red flags by continuing things even if there are concerns you're overlooking since this is your shot.
According to the neuropsychologist, 'stacking' can help you 'avoid overinvesting emotionally in someone before you can tell if you're actually compatible'.
Where does 'stacking' go wrong?
The obvious problem with having a bunch of short dates in succession is that it's hard to strike up that spark or connection you would get from interacting with someone for a longer period of time.
You might end up turning someone down before you've given yourself the time to know them.
If you're giving someone about an hour, that's really not very much time at all to spend with them in the hopes of striking up a connection, by the time you've made your introductions you're really going to be on the clock.
It may be 'ruthlessly efficient' but that's hardly the vibe you want to be giving off after a date with someone, when she gets home and starts discussing you with the group chat those two words are not what you want to be described as.
Plus, you can't exactly tell your date why you've got to skedaddle after just an hour, as they'd hardly appreciate being told you had another date lined up that day.
Maybe just give people time?
Topics: Dating trends, Sex and Relationships, Community
Joe Harker