Dad recalls harrowing day teenage son took his own life as he urges others to speak out
A bereaved dad has recalled the heartbreaking day his teenage son took his own life and has now urged others to speak out this Mental Health Awareness Week.
Dave Thompson's 18-year-old son George died by suicide in 2021 after years of struggling with his mental health.
George had shown signs of mental health issues around the age of 10, and by 15 admitted to his dad that he was having suicidal thoughts.
Over the course of the next three years, like many others who suffer with a mental illness, George had good and bad days. The late teenager often spoke of experiencing 'thunderstorms' on the days his mental health was particularly bad.
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Despite his struggles, George went on finish his GCSEs, go to college and complete his A levels, and got a job that he seemed to enjoy. But the 'thunderstorms' kept coming.
In the month leading up to his death, George came home from work one day and said that he had 'f**ked up'.
The teenager went on to say that he'd attempted to jump in front of train, but got the timings wrong.
"George was taken to A&E on several occasions when he had spoken to us about his thoughts," explained Dave. "On the day he tried to take his life in September, we took him in.
"We were ultimately allowed to come home because George was classed as 'low risk' - despite trying to take his own life just several hours earlier."
A month later in the October, George tried to take his own life again. This time, he didn't miss the train.
Recalling the devastating day, Dave received a call from George's boss telling him that the teenager had gone missing off a building site and that his colleagues were struggling to find him.
With the site being just a couple of miles away from their home, Dave went to go help with the search and turned up to find police tape surrounding the house George had been working in.
"There was a police officer in uniform and a police officer in a suit, and I had a conversation with the guy in the suit," Dave shared. "And his first worry was that I was going to run out into the road to look for George, but I assured him that I didn't want to cause him any additional work.
"I said, 'I just want to know where my son is', and he asked me to get in his car, which I refused twice. I then said, 'I just want to know where my son is, and I want to know if there's a body on line.'."
The police officer went on to confirm that there was a body on the line and when Dave asked about the likelihood of it being his son and the chances of him surviving, the officer said that, from the descriptions of George he'd received, it was him. He also said there was a 99 percent mortality rate.
"I got into my own car and screamed and shouted and punched the ceiling and steering wheel and I cried," Dave recalled.
"I was supposed to be photographing Man City that night, and I called my picture editor and said, 'I can't do the game. George has taken his own life'."
George's family have been grieving their loss ever since, and at one stage Dave was struggling so much he admitted that he didn't care if he personally lived or died.
"I was missing George," he shared with LADbible. "All the feelings I was having of not wanting to be here and maybe driving a bit too fast and not really caring whether I lost control of my car or not."
Knowing he was needing help and feeling 'unable to wait' the amount of weeks to see a counsellor, Dave came across Mentell - a UK charity that provides free access to men's groups for males aged 18+ to talk in a safe and confidential space.
Dave discovered that there was a group close to him in Stockport on a Monday evening and went to his first meeting within days of signing up online.
He now credits the charity for getting him through the loss of George and hopes other men like him will go to a Mentell session to share what's on their minds.
"I've got a place I can go where I know I feel safe," Dave said. "I know that everything I say is kept in the strictest confidence. Confidentiality is the bedrock of what makes it work as it makes men feel an element of trust and that they know that their story isn't going to get leaked online."
He further shared that there's no commitment to attend the groups and that men can attend as many group sessions as they like; but Dave personally finds he misses the sessions if he happens to not go one week.
As well as weekly face-to-face men’s groups, Mentell offers weekly sessions online via Zoom.
Mentell has a 'Turn Your Bar Blue' campaign which advertises its services on things like beer mats, with over 1,000 bars and pubs across the UK having signed up to the scheme.
The charity says that around 600 men join Mentell each year through its 'Turn Your Bar Blue' campaign.
Last year, 5,579 lives were lost to suicide in England, marking a 5.6% increase from 2022, according to provisional data from the ONS.
Each number you read above was someone who was loved.
Share the message. Spread the word. Save a life. A simple U OK M8? can make all the difference.
If you need help, you can access help through Mentell's services via the website, or via their social media pages on Facebook and Instagram.
Topics: Health, Mental Health, News, Originals, UOKM8
Niamh Shackleton