Psychologist reveals five key points to break social comfort zone and make conversation with strangers

Every friendship group tends to have those louder, more outgoing ones who can happily chat away to whatever unlucky soul ends up next to them.

But there’s also plenty of us who might feel a little less confident and can’t imagine anything worse than having to strike up conversation with a stranger.

Granted it’s not always exactly ideal to decide to start chatting to some randomer, but in some cases like a shared space in a pub or a big work party with every department under the sun, it can be nice to have a little gab.

Having a natter with strangers isn't for everyone, and many struggle with the concept of breaking into conversation with someone they don't know well (Getty Stock Image)

And I mean, all your best mates start off as strangers, right?

So, as part of Beavertown Brewery’s ‘Is This Seat Taken?’ campaign, a psychologist has revealed five key points to break your social comfort zone and make conversation with strangers.

Always make eye contact

Look, the thought of this might sound like absolute hell, but Katherine Templar Lewis says it ‘can make all the difference’. This is as it signals that we can be trusted, growing their confidence in both us and them.

Plus, the psychologist explains that when two people engage in prolonged eye contact, oxytocin levels bond. “You chemically start to bond,” she says.

“And lastly, making eye contact allows you to focus on the conversation and read facial expressions even better.”

The psychologist has some tips to start a convo (Beavertown Brewery)

Don’t forget to smile

Similarly, having a little smile increases mood-enhancing hormones like dopamine and endorphins while also decreasing stress-enhancing hormones.

While also reducing overall blood pressure, smiling again gives a signal of trust.

“When you smile at someone, it's almost impossible for them to not smile back, and when they do they get the same chemical boost, making them like you even more,” Templar Lewis explains.

Take part in a tiny ritual

Ok, the psychologist isn’t saying to start doing yoga and praying together, but maybe a little cheers of your drink to create a moment ‘of shared meaning and connection’.

Sharing an everyday ritual with someone can calm our nervous system and help us to bond better with this stranger.

Eye contact might sound horrible, but it makes a huge difference (Getty Stock)

Make small talk

Yeah, another thing that plenty of us dread but it’s an important way to get proper conversations ticked off.

By having small talk, we can ‘find points of commonality and shared interest, creating bonds, trust and a sense of familiarity’. Then, who knows, you might end up becoming besties.

The psychologist recommends: “Questions such as ‘where have you come from?’, ‘what brought you here?’, and ‘how are you finding the weather?’ can all not just find points of shared interest to spark wider conversations, but also show how interested we are in the other person, and people showing interest.”

Own the awkward

Look, even with Templar Lewis’ tips, making conversation with a stranger probably will feel a little weird.

But while you might feel awkward (which is very natural), the psychologist says to ‘pursh on’. “Focus on the positive outcomes, keep going, and soon your body will quickly recognise there is no threat your nervous system will calm,” she says.

“Plus with all the positive chemicals we make when laughing with others, you’ll feel better in no time.”

Well, there you go lads, time to chat to that person in the pub you always nod your head at but never actually speak to.