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Dating expert reveals hidden ‘red flag' trait as she explains main reasons people cheat on their partners

Home> Lifestyle

Updated 16:00 21 Sep 2025 GMT+1Published 20:01 9 Sep 2025 GMT+1

Dating expert reveals hidden ‘red flag' trait as she explains main reasons people cheat on their partners

Jana Hocking has shared the major red flag to watch out for when it comes to finding your ideal partner

Ffion Jarvis

Ffion Jarvis

Dating is a treacherous landscape most of us attempt to traverse at some point in our lives.

How do you know if you've met the one or just the next one? Do you play it cool or go all in? And once you're in a relationship, how can you be sure they're not going to break that trust?

Sadly, infidelity is a fact of life. Yep, the cruel, gut-wrenching act of being cheated on is something countless people experienced way before you knew about it.

And in that scenario, couples generally have two choices, they can decide to either persevere when the going gets tough or just go their separate ways.

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But why does someone actually cheat on their partner in the first place? Well, one dating expert has shared their thoughts on the subject, and the 'red flag' to watch out for when searching for a suitor.

Why do people cheat?

Cheaters seek validation (Getty Images)
Cheaters seek validation (Getty Images)

Jana Hocking has been vocal on her findings, suggesting the main reasons people tend to do the dirty on their partner is a search for 'adrenaline rushes' and 'validation'.

"I think they take the risk because they think it is sexy or exciting, or the sneaking around is giving their everyday boring lives a bit of an adrenaline rush," the Australian columnist explained on Australia's Weekend Today.

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If that wasn't bad enough, she also suggested that people's insecurities and the need for validation can lead to them looking elsewhere for love.

She added: "Average boys are cheating on ten out of ten girls. That is the common theme."

Hocking speculated that the reason why people decide to be unfaithful to their partners is due to insecurities about their 'hot' partners. They may feel like they require the validation that they are hot too, so they seek it outside of the relationship.

Yes, Hocking thinks 'it's ridiculous' too.

Surprising 'red flag' someone might cheat

Hocking also warned of potential suitors who appear 'really charming' because this could actually be a big red flag in a relationship.

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And dating coach and licensed therapist Kelsey Wonderlin has gone into more detail about why a man who's 'charming' might not ultimately be a good match - and she claims it could even be a red flag the person could be abusive.

Charming suitors may not be the person you are looking for (Getty Images)
Charming suitors may not be the person you are looking for (Getty Images)

Wonderlin wrote: "Women have been socialized to want a charming man who 'courts' you, tries to win you over, & makes you feel special.

"But these qualities can indicate a lack of healthy relationship skills, as the concept of 'courting' is historically absent of any focus on deeper emotional intelligence.

"Emotionally aware partners want to get to know you, not 'woo' you, and they have their own needs and wants, too.

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"In the worst cases, these flags *can* indicate a potential for abuse."

Dating can be scary and unpredictable in the world of social media today, but if you listen to the dating experts your red flag radar will only improve.

Featured Image Credit: Instagram/ @‌jana_hocking

Topics: Dating trends, Sex and Relationships, Lifestyle

Ffion Jarvis
Ffion Jarvis

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