A relationship coach has been revealing the five major red flags you need to be on the lookout for at the start of a new relationship.
However they might end up, most relationships tend to start of pretty well, or at least they seem that way but in many cases the warning signs might have been there right from the beginning.
A new relationship brings with it that heady cocktail of endorphins which make you feel like you're having the time of your life and your new sweetheart is the most wonderful and interesting person in the world.
Advert
Not to put a downer on things but most relationships are doomed to fail, and when it all falls apart, people often realise that in hindsight there were some early warning signs they missed.
Dating coach Jacob Lucas has taken to TikTok to outline five major red flags you should be on the lookout for when you've just met that someone potentially special.
Red Flag 1: Spilling Secrets
Advert
According to Jacob, the first big warning you need to heed is getting in a relationship with someone who immediately starts spilling their guts.
More specifically, the dating coach explained secrets 'that will make you feel pity for them early on' are the ones to be on the lookout for.
"People who have been through genuine hard times in their life very rarely share that with people who they just met," the expert explained, laying out that this was likely a tactic to 'see how you emotionally respond to them'.
Not spotting this early on can be a problem, as he said 'if they get the reaction they're looking for they will think you are easy to manipulate'.
Advert
Red Flag 2: Badmouthing the Ex
While anyone out of an old relationship may feel the need to vent about some of their ex's habits, it's not a great idea to do it to a new partner.
In particular, it's important to watch out for words like 'crazy', them blaming their ex for everything and just the general oversharing details of a past relationship with a new partner.
Advert
Jacob said this red flag indicated someone was 'socially unaware' as pretty much everyone ought to know people don't want to be on a date with someone just to listen to them talk about their ex.
Nip it in the bud or one day it'll be you they're calling crazy over coffee the next partner.
Red Flag 3: Indecisiveness
Advert
Nobody wants to be in a relationship with someone who cannot make a decision to save their lives.
According to the dating coach, you need to be paying attention to whether you're planning all the dates and making the major decision in your relationship.
People might joke about who wears the trousers in a relationship but if you're responsible for every choice that will get 'exhausting'.
Red Flag 4: Badmouthing Buddies
Moaning about the ex is a problem but so is constantly complaining about friends.
One of the great things about being a grown up is getting to choose who you hang out with, if they're always insulting their friends to you behind their backs it's probably not the best character reference for them.
Plus, if they're saying that about their friends to you, what are they saying about you to their friends?
Red Flag 5: Incompatible Ambition
You know what you want out of life and being with a partner who wants exactly the opposite is going to be a problem.
If you want cosy nights in then you don't want the party animal who's going out clubbing every weekend and the reverse is true, if you want to go out and do things then getting in a relationship with someone who barely ever leaves their sofa just won't work long term.
The dating coach said 'you either grow together or your grow apart' and if each half of a relationship wants very different things then growing apart seems far more likely.
Topics: Sex and Relationships
Joe Harker