Look, if it’s your preference, then fair enough, but for most plain old vanilla action in the bedroom, things can get a little boring after a while.
So plenty of people will look for different options to make things a little spicier.
Perhaps you’ve got a hefty toy collection or you and your partner enjoy getting others in on the action.
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Or maybe you’ve got your own kinks you incorporate into your sex life. And while there are many kinks a lot of people don’t know exist, a psychologist has revealed how one can improve their overall sex life.
Psychologists reckon that elements of BDSM can have mega improvements to a couple's general love lives.
For those not versed (or a little freaked out by the idea), it stands for bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadochism and masochism.
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And the psychologist explained that the core principles of the sexual practice of good communication can be good for any couple – no matter how freaky they are in the sheets.
The Journal of Sexual Medicine took that focus on communication and found that those who take part in BDSM are ‘less neurotic, more extraverted, more open to new experiences, more conscientious, less rejection-sensitive, and had higher subjective well-being'.
So with a bit of good communication, it could simply open up a safe space for your partner to discuss their fantasies and desires.
But it could also encourage you to see sex more as a bit of fun and ‘play’, rather than something that just becomes repetitive and well, boring.
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In the world of kink, ‘play’ reflects how those engage with it see sex as fun but also as a way to use their brains and be creative.
The New School Psychology Bulletin also included that another key part of BDSM is the focus on consent – another thing that can help couples out.
The psychologist explained how consent can be quite vague in mainstream – usually just viewed as saying that for sex, you just need a yes or no.
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But BDSM practitioners have more indicators of consent, often taking part in clear discussions before a ‘scene’ (a planned sexual interaction).
As well as that yes or no and even sometimes written consent, those in the community rely on body cues and pre-agreed safe words.
So, by adopting bits of the BDSM practices, it could make both you and your partner feel safer and more willing to explore different forms of sex and acts.
Plus, the benefits of adopting these core principles could make mega changes, with research finding that BDSM practitioners are generally more sexually satisfied overall.
Topics: Sex and Relationships, Mental Health